Life is temporary.
Feeling very un good. Yet I don't know why. No. That isn't right. I know damn well why. I feel insignificant. I feel like everyone is consistantly mocking me, they don't really give a crap about me, they just humor me and try not to hurt my feelings. I feel taken advantage of. Everytime that I interact with someone, they always are taking something from me... draining my very life away. I feel that I do nice things for people only to have them forgotten about minutes later. I don't understand. Is something wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? I just don't understand I'm so confused. Walking through the halls today, I just wanted to cry. I don't know why. I feel rotten. I feel as though my insides are dying. Leaving just a shell behind. An absolute, crushing, sadness. It's all for show, no body cares, and the utter superficiality of it hurts me. I still can't understand. Why should I care? If they don't care about me, why should I care about them? Why can't I just be the person I used to be and get over it? Tell the whole world to take a flying leap and get on with life right? Because I'm weak that's why. Somehow I went soft I guess. Now I need people. I didn't used to, but now I have become accustomed to them. And when they hurt you? What then? How can I possibly have any faith in all of this.... this... I don't know what. How can I have faith in humanity itself when even those I trust hurt me. I can't. Even with all of this crap that I've smeared on this webpage. I still havn't even come close to the real reason. Because I don't know it. It simply exists. Or rather. Doesn't exsist. There was a book written long ago. named The Neverending Story. Where Nothing is eating up an entire world. The Nothing. It has no shape, no color, for what colour is nothingness? And all who look upon it are drawn to it, like moths to a lightbulb. Kinda feels like that. Where something is most certainly wrong, but quite impossible to see. But there are no heros to save me as there were to save that imaginary world.
"Remember youth as you pass by,
As you are now, so once was I,
As I am now, you soon will be,
Prepare to die and follow me"
-CR
Feeling very un good. Yet I don't know why. No. That isn't right. I know damn well why. I feel insignificant. I feel like everyone is consistantly mocking me, they don't really give a crap about me, they just humor me and try not to hurt my feelings. I feel taken advantage of. Everytime that I interact with someone, they always are taking something from me... draining my very life away. I feel that I do nice things for people only to have them forgotten about minutes later. I don't understand. Is something wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? I just don't understand I'm so confused. Walking through the halls today, I just wanted to cry. I don't know why. I feel rotten. I feel as though my insides are dying. Leaving just a shell behind. An absolute, crushing, sadness. It's all for show, no body cares, and the utter superficiality of it hurts me. I still can't understand. Why should I care? If they don't care about me, why should I care about them? Why can't I just be the person I used to be and get over it? Tell the whole world to take a flying leap and get on with life right? Because I'm weak that's why. Somehow I went soft I guess. Now I need people. I didn't used to, but now I have become accustomed to them. And when they hurt you? What then? How can I possibly have any faith in all of this.... this... I don't know what. How can I have faith in humanity itself when even those I trust hurt me. I can't. Even with all of this crap that I've smeared on this webpage. I still havn't even come close to the real reason. Because I don't know it. It simply exists. Or rather. Doesn't exsist. There was a book written long ago. named The Neverending Story. Where Nothing is eating up an entire world. The Nothing. It has no shape, no color, for what colour is nothingness? And all who look upon it are drawn to it, like moths to a lightbulb. Kinda feels like that. Where something is most certainly wrong, but quite impossible to see. But there are no heros to save me as there were to save that imaginary world.
"Remember youth as you pass by,
As you are now, so once was I,
As I am now, you soon will be,
Prepare to die and follow me"
-CR
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