Click click click. yeah.
clicks are kinda like that.
what you take for granted, others will never have.
Switching gears.
You're prolly heard all sorts of, "oh I'm so sorry for you, we love you"
Well, if you did, I wouldn't. So there you go. At least it's something you havn't heard.
Listen up smacktard. I'm here to clue you in. You think that this life isn't worth living, that this life is pathetic, painful, that this life... somehow owes you something.
I know so many people that would gladly switch your life for theirs. Would you disrespect them by wasting yours?
What about the man with the baby jokes? He was one of the most alive people that I ever did know, and he is also one of the most dead. I'm not in your shoes. I can't tell you what your life is about. But I can tell you that if you are not glad for the fact that your legs work, you'll never know how much I wish that I did not have a permanent limp. How lucky, but i'm not pissed, I'm still happy to be able to walk semi-normally. Your hands are dexterious, you've never seen the pain of someone watching their livelyhood slip away because of an accident. The hands that once moved with millimeter precision now have no feeling at all, no nerves. Only an electrical shock every now and again reminds him that they even exsist. He is watching his life crumble around him, everthing that he has worked for, 62 years worth of work, falling to pieces in front of his eyes. But he holds us tighter now. He cares more now. He's still a bastard and I wish he would die sometimes, but I cannot credit the man with at least knowing that there is always something to be grateful for.
This world owes you NOTHING.
You have been given so much.
You can NOT deny that, and if you do I will bludgeon you to death with a rubber truncheon. And then I guess you'll have saved yourself the trouble eh? Because if you will deny that you are gifted, then you are creating this world of pain for yourself.
Listen. When was the last time that you were concious of all the gifts you've recieved. Even the simple things... It's fucking 2 in the moring damnit. I'm about as coherent as studder-er on speed.
the point is I'm not going to sit here and say oh poor you, here have a crutch.
if you're miserable, the problem is you.
You say you can't see beauty in the world. then you obviously are walking around with your eyes closed.
Where is your sense of WONDER. Ever look at a tree? ever think, of all of the systems, that have to work together in PERFECT harmony to let that rather simple life form exsist? What about sight? what about the way the sun's light splits out of the atmosphere. What about water? What about music. What about... language... mathmatics...
what about friendship...
What about Love?
IF this all comes down to that girl again, i will be angry. I don't think it is, but you have tasted love, you know what it is, you must know what an amazing feeling it is... and you would say that there is cause for happiness? What about hope? Have you none of that either?
You know what a councilor is going to say? Gee, sounds like life's a bitch, man am I glad i'm not you.
I can't change your world, I can't change your thinking, I can't change your life.
No one can change your life.
Only you can change your life.
You've stopped looking. You think these things will always be here? Do you think that you will always be able to walk? Run? I can't. and i miss it, you never realize just how wonderful, just how... amazing the simple things are. just what a small thing can make everything go wrong.
By now you're pissed, oh, what betrayal! gasp! anger! rage at having to read a poorly written and ill concieved rant!
I feel like you're expecting the world to give you a reason to live. A reason to be happy. Bullshit. You'll be waiting all your life.
You have to make your own reason.
And that's all I have to say about that.
I'm sorry. Life can be... difficult... at times. But don't you ever, EVER forget everything you have. I can fill my hands with people who would switch places with you.
This is usually the part of our program where people list off all the crap they've been through in an effort to out-do the other one with life hardships, at best it is a gloified penis size contest. I dont' play that game because it isn't honest. Every person deals with life differently. Some people like to pretend it didn't happen. I am one of the people who remembers, but forgives, and comes to terms with. In short, it doesn't matter what you've been through. "I don't deal" you dont' deal, my ass. Even, "not dealing" is a method of dealment.
What I see is a boy. Too frightened to step up to the plate. To accept real responsibility for himself, and his life. It pisses me off because I see great things for you, if you could just get your shit together. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and waxing lyrical about suicide.
I can't tell you what to do though. It's all about choices. You are choosing your depression. No one is lumping it onto you.
you are choosing it.
Remember that.
Bad things happening do not cause depression.
Depression only happens when people want to be depressed.
Look very closely at your hand. Every muscle and tendon and ligament and bone in that hand. easily over 1000. All of that. and it works perfectly.
-CR
clicks are kinda like that.
what you take for granted, others will never have.
Switching gears.
You're prolly heard all sorts of, "oh I'm so sorry for you, we love you"
Well, if you did, I wouldn't. So there you go. At least it's something you havn't heard.
Listen up smacktard. I'm here to clue you in. You think that this life isn't worth living, that this life is pathetic, painful, that this life... somehow owes you something.
I know so many people that would gladly switch your life for theirs. Would you disrespect them by wasting yours?
What about the man with the baby jokes? He was one of the most alive people that I ever did know, and he is also one of the most dead. I'm not in your shoes. I can't tell you what your life is about. But I can tell you that if you are not glad for the fact that your legs work, you'll never know how much I wish that I did not have a permanent limp. How lucky, but i'm not pissed, I'm still happy to be able to walk semi-normally. Your hands are dexterious, you've never seen the pain of someone watching their livelyhood slip away because of an accident. The hands that once moved with millimeter precision now have no feeling at all, no nerves. Only an electrical shock every now and again reminds him that they even exsist. He is watching his life crumble around him, everthing that he has worked for, 62 years worth of work, falling to pieces in front of his eyes. But he holds us tighter now. He cares more now. He's still a bastard and I wish he would die sometimes, but I cannot credit the man with at least knowing that there is always something to be grateful for.
This world owes you NOTHING.
You have been given so much.
You can NOT deny that, and if you do I will bludgeon you to death with a rubber truncheon. And then I guess you'll have saved yourself the trouble eh? Because if you will deny that you are gifted, then you are creating this world of pain for yourself.
Listen. When was the last time that you were concious of all the gifts you've recieved. Even the simple things... It's fucking 2 in the moring damnit. I'm about as coherent as studder-er on speed.
the point is I'm not going to sit here and say oh poor you, here have a crutch.
if you're miserable, the problem is you.
You say you can't see beauty in the world. then you obviously are walking around with your eyes closed.
Where is your sense of WONDER. Ever look at a tree? ever think, of all of the systems, that have to work together in PERFECT harmony to let that rather simple life form exsist? What about sight? what about the way the sun's light splits out of the atmosphere. What about water? What about music. What about... language... mathmatics...
what about friendship...
What about Love?
IF this all comes down to that girl again, i will be angry. I don't think it is, but you have tasted love, you know what it is, you must know what an amazing feeling it is... and you would say that there is cause for happiness? What about hope? Have you none of that either?
You know what a councilor is going to say? Gee, sounds like life's a bitch, man am I glad i'm not you.
I can't change your world, I can't change your thinking, I can't change your life.
No one can change your life.
Only you can change your life.
You've stopped looking. You think these things will always be here? Do you think that you will always be able to walk? Run? I can't. and i miss it, you never realize just how wonderful, just how... amazing the simple things are. just what a small thing can make everything go wrong.
By now you're pissed, oh, what betrayal! gasp! anger! rage at having to read a poorly written and ill concieved rant!
I feel like you're expecting the world to give you a reason to live. A reason to be happy. Bullshit. You'll be waiting all your life.
You have to make your own reason.
And that's all I have to say about that.
I'm sorry. Life can be... difficult... at times. But don't you ever, EVER forget everything you have. I can fill my hands with people who would switch places with you.
This is usually the part of our program where people list off all the crap they've been through in an effort to out-do the other one with life hardships, at best it is a gloified penis size contest. I dont' play that game because it isn't honest. Every person deals with life differently. Some people like to pretend it didn't happen. I am one of the people who remembers, but forgives, and comes to terms with. In short, it doesn't matter what you've been through. "I don't deal" you dont' deal, my ass. Even, "not dealing" is a method of dealment.
What I see is a boy. Too frightened to step up to the plate. To accept real responsibility for himself, and his life. It pisses me off because I see great things for you, if you could just get your shit together. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and waxing lyrical about suicide.
I can't tell you what to do though. It's all about choices. You are choosing your depression. No one is lumping it onto you.
you are choosing it.
Remember that.
Bad things happening do not cause depression.
Depression only happens when people want to be depressed.
Look very closely at your hand. Every muscle and tendon and ligament and bone in that hand. easily over 1000. All of that. and it works perfectly.
-CR
